父母关系，孩子的命运

陳榮榮老師|「身心與健康」•家族/組織系統排列工作坊/ 3-4•香港

我的感受和學習 （Part 5 )

一位个案，爸爸有两个老婆，一个在大陆，一个在香港。爸爸和香港的老婆，也就是个案的妈妈关系很不好，但对个案不错。

因为家庭中父母之间的鸿沟，孩子虽有爸爸的爱，妈妈的爱爱，还是很失落。

孩子一直不敢对爸爸有愤怒，虽然他伤害了两个女人。孩子是堕胎后不能再堕胎了才被逼生下她，所以，她感到不是父母想要的。

压抑的愤怒，突然爆发，很是痛苦。大哭。

因为父母之间的愤怒，导致自己被伤害，所以很怕愤怒，怕自己的愤怒也伤害别人。

老师说：

憤怒不是壞事，愤怒也是力量。

感受自己的情緒，不要壓抑它，去理解它，化憤怒為智慧，為力量。為自己的生命負責任

爱的深，恨之切

對於受傷的孩子，不要扛起父母的责任，父母的关系不和，是他们自己的事。把父母的心結還給父母，活出自己。

这也是一种能力。放下不属于自己的责任

提醒我：

不要在孩子面前说丈夫或太太的不是，坏话，这样是直接伤害孩子的心，令他们没有安全感。

父母的关系，直接影响孩子的个性。孩子的人格和命运。

父母好好爱自己，搞好自己的关系，就是给与孩子最大的爱。

成年的孩子，尝试整合父母好的和怀的部分，保留和继承好的，断绝坏的，不要在自己一代继续

当我们越是恨一个人，我们就越会成为那个憎恨的部。


we become what we resist

What are you Resisting in your Life?

Posted December 1, 2015 by Meghan Toups

Carl Jung so aptly wrote, “What you resist, persists.”

When we begin to understand personal patterns, and bring into our awareness that which does not serve us, we can begin to shift our lives. Don’t ignore those negative coping mechanisms. They are there for a reason. What’s the underlying reason? What are they masking? Don’t resist thinking of them. Bring awareness, with gentle self compassion. Then create a plan for making a change.

And the journey to your own personal Shift in consciousness unfolds.

What are you resisting in your life? What makes you upset if you are to think of them?

Depression? Anxiety? Poor eating habits? An unhealthy relationship? Low self-esteem?

What if you were to take a look at these things. It’s scary to look at the shadows of our life. Enlist the support of a guide, a therapist or coach to help you get through them. Stop resisting them. They are in your life for a reason. Our shadows are simply a language of the body. Masking something for you to look more deeply upon. To uncover a deeper part of your life. Are you eating poorly because you are working too hard at a job that doesn’t fulfill you? Are you in an unhealthy relationship because you don’t feel like you deserve to be truly loved? What is the deeper part of your shadow? Don’t resist. Gently move forward to create a Shift and redefine your life.

Love, Light and good Health,

http://mergeintohealth.com/what-are-you-resisting-in-your-life/

6 8 2019