https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Fga5JN17inGALDuLXO03q8vCCeYICgih/view?usp=sharing
10-12-2013
今天我同你一起做一个接受阴影, 轉化生命的meditation. 一个清理负面情绪,负面记忆的自我疗愈的过程.
相信人生所有痛苦的根源﹐都来自過去而尚未清理的負面記憶。记忆产生思想,信念,信念产生情绪,情绪影响行动。行动带来结果,结果带来命运。当我们清除不斷重複的「負面記憶」﹐我们的创意.潜能就会充分发挥出来,因为我们的心里障碍一旦消除,純潔的本性,爱心,同理心,责任心就会呈现出来,产生巨大的亲和力,凝聚力,领导力和执行力.
首先,让自己放松,放松,做几下深呼吸,吸气,呼气, 吸气,呼气,每呼气一次,想象将所有的疲劳,压力,任何不舒服的感觉,在空气中,消失的 无影无踪,每吸气一次,都带来更多正能量,令每个细胞都充满氧气,充满生命力!
吸气,呼气,每块肌肉都开始放松落来,放松落来.
吸气,呼气, 放松,更放松.
越放松,就越接近自己的潜意识,入的越深,就越接近自己的心灵深处.
让我们以轻松,开放的心情去学习心理大师CARL JUNG陰影理論,明白負面記憶产生阴影, 而阴影影响我们的思维模式,行动和人与人之间的关系,通过反复做轉化的修炼,走出阴影,创造积极,充满阳光的生命.
何谓阴影,Carl Yung指出,
PERCEPTION IS
PROJECTION. 人往往容易将自己的理解,想象看成是事实,真相的全部。然后投射出去。
包括“未完全接納自己的部份”﹐變成「他人的問題」。心灵导师周華山博士形象地演绎着是shadow 陰影的存在。他说,“阴影投射機制,生活裡無處不在﹕如果我對他人仍然抗拒,代表我對自己仍然批評,仍然未寬、恕自己的過錯。相反,對他人有多接納﹐就代表對自己有多接納和寬恕。若我抗拒自己﹐就誰都會抗拒.”
陰影投射機制往往以抗拒形式出现. 抗拒的形式有几种;
一种是我抗拒的正正是我自己的一部分.或者曾经有的一部分,我仍没接受到它.当我抗拒,批判对方时,道德上我好像我有种优越感,,一种自我保护,但实际上是一种逃避.
或者我抗拒的人拥有我尚未得到的东西.于是我会有不安,不满,甚至妒忌.
由或者是, 对于童年阴影,原生家庭的过去, 对自己的成长中有些不愉快的经历,或者痛苦仍不能释怀.尤其是对父母仍没原谅,例如,如果我仍然批判父亲的操控,那么我对今天眼前可能出现操控的人,一样会再抗拒,我甚至有过之而不及,变成了另一个自己不愿见到的现象,另一个操控者.
是的,當我們平靜的面對一個潛意識裡面的自我,不難發現,我們每個人都有脆弱的一面,一個內在小孩,他/她可能仍是那麼頑皮,自我,甚至自私,傲慢,霸道,那種不可一世的德性仍不知不覺地投射在日常人與人之間的關系中; 他/她可能仍是那麼脆弱,仍有自卑,妒忌這種低自我形象的心態,令人時不時容易產生無名的不滿,憤怒,焦慮,聽到讚美別人的说話多多少少都會有刺痛的感覺; 他/她可能對於自己原生家庭,童年陰影仍耿耿於懷,一遇到類似的情形,"觸景生情”,好容易与别人产生衝突,或者選擇”閃开”,逃避……
從这里,我们明白到,當我將自己的問題變成他人的問題,表面上合理化了自己,但實際上只能產生更多對外界的抗拒心,對自我的不滿,批判,帶來更多心結,負面記憶,導致負面信念,最終是負面的結果,雙輸的局面.
如何走出阴影,將陰影化為力量?
当我清晰的看到自己的阴影和头射机制,明白到 阴影投射機制是人性的一部分,人性的弱點, 我就可以勇敢的面对自己的阴暗面,我也就不会抗拒别人的阴暗面.當我們接受自己的脆弱面,我們就會有同理心去接受別人的脆弱面,,當我們可以包容這個共同的弱點,我們就可以擁有內心的平靜,有平靜輕鬆的狀態,我們的潛意識就會發揮出原有的智慧,解決問題的能力就會昇華,人變得更有彈性,發現更多更好的選擇.
-當有不同意見,不同的見解,看下自己有否受到shadow 的影响,清除了它,就会有气量去聆听,從多角度看問題,,用坦誠,真誠,商量的態度,找到解決問題的最佳方法。
-看到别人比自己强或拥有自己没有的东西,不妨想下自己可以如何提升,自己去创造;又或者看下别人付出多少,是否自己真正愿意付出呢?又或者我其实已经拥有好多好多 .
-对于童年阴影,原生家庭的过去,不妨从另一个角度想下, 父母都是人,人就会犯错。如果我们不想让上一辈的不愉快的事发生,不让历史重演,我们就必须终止愤怒,不满。如果我们想要终止父母劣质的部分继承他们优秀的部分,我们首先要学习尊重自己的家庭系统,尊重自己的过去,从中得到学习,释放压抑的情绪。这样我们才能真正接纳自己,接纳父母,从潜意识上,也就是从内在小孩心灵呈面,改变对父母,长辈的态度,从自己的骨子里改变对他们的看法。这样我们就可以真正宽恕父母,宽恕任何令自己不舒服的人,最终是宽恕自己,放下历史包袱走出阴影,洗净洛印,MOVE FORWARD !
Mandela总统在他的就职典礼上讲到: 當我穿過大門走向大閘,即將獲得自由時,我明白若我不放下痛苦及仇恨,則仍然活在監獄中.
宽恕别人其实是宽恕自己,解放自己。清理掉心灵上的垃圾,让自己心灵的空间更纯净,更广阔,有我,也有你,有他,有世界。当我们懂得欣赏别人,学习别人的长处,其实我们是在接纳自己的不足,从而选择改变,这是爱惜自己的表现。
年轻時的曼德拉是一个颇为「情緒化、敏感的人,總是一下就被別人的侮辱和施捨而刺痛,反擊報復。」(passionate, emotional, sensitive, quickly stung to
bitterness and retaliation by insult and patronage)「但出獄时的曼德拉,已經把這些一一洗刷掉,完全再不看不到這些特質。常常聽到曼德拉讚賞別人,「穩定」(balanced)、「從容不迫」(measured)、「有節制」(controlled)。一個人對別人的讚美往往反映了自我的心靈世界,因此,相信這裏也反映了曼德拉的自我形象。」
当曼德拉放下仇恨,走出阴影所带来的巨大改变,给国家人民世界带来的巨大福祉,特别是精神财富,我们可以体会到阴影的力量.
现在,请再次作下深呼吸,放松放松.想象眼前出现了一位自己曾经抗拒的人,或仍然抗拒的人.同时用投射机制检视下自己,如果看到自己的阴影,让自己与对方并排坐在一起.看到自己其实与对方一样,自己也有同样的问题,最重要的是我们大家都渴望得到别人的接纳,尊重,我们的心灵深处,都有爱和被爱的渴求,此刻,请用心去体谅和接纳自己和对方的不足,我们就会有一种无比的释放,释怀,看到一个不一样的自己,不一样的对方,真正宽恕自己,原谅对方.MOVE FORWARD.
-从接受陰影,轉化生命的过程,我们会感受到华山讲的好:
-接納虛偽﹐就會長出真誠。接納恐懼﹐就會長出勇氣。
-生命唯一的出路﹐就是勇敢面對。接納陰影﹐與陰影做好朋友。
-人生最大的成就不是不斷創造,而是勇於接受自己,真正懂得愛自己。在现实生活中我们看到不少由爱变成恨的结局。当自己不懂爱自己,就会将对自己的批判投射在别人身上,产生操控或索取。原來真正的愛,不是要去操控别人,而是给人带来溫暖,信任,舒服和自由。
-陰影既然與生俱來,必然有她的意義和信息; 和她做朋友,讓她走向正面,生命道路將順暢好多,至少沒有那麼多的煩惱,妒忌,焦慮和埋怨。更多愛,包容和幸福。
-走出陰影,就是擴大自己的心胸,心有几广,路就有几闊。
當看到自己的陰影部分,我们都会有一種釋放感,喜悅感。我们要赞美欣赏自己的心胸已开阔不少了。放下不少。 A SENSE OF RELEASE, JOY,AND
PEACE.原來每個人都有自省自癒的能力,從真正認識自己,接受自己開始.
今后,让我们通过
清理阴影的修炼,不断审视自己的阴暗面,不断清理负面情绪,人都会自在好多,放松好多,开朗好多,包容好多,健康好多,幸福好多!
http://www.headgearlabs.com/perception-is-projection/
When someone
called the other person something derogatory – it was the ultimate put-down to
reply, “it takes one to know one”.
That simple
phrase is the basis of one of the 4 themes that we teach in NLP – one that
people often struggle to get their heads around – the theme of ‘Perception is
Projection’.
Carl Jung once said “Everything
that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
http://mindmastery.wordpress.com/2007/03/12/perception-is-projection/
Perception is Projection explained
By Francesca On August 21, 2013 · 1 Comment
“It Takes One to Know One . . .”
In this
article, I will explain, simply, the concept of ‘Perception is Projection’, but
first, let’s go back to the heading above. How many of us either heard or
used that famous phrase as a child?
When
someone called the other person something derogatory – it was the ultimate
put-down to reply, “it takes one to know one”.
That
simple phrase is the basis of one of the 4 themes that we teach in NLP – one that
people often struggle to get their heads around – the theme of ‘Perception is
Projection’.
So what exactly is Perception is Projection?
In
a nutshell, perception is projection is the idea that what you see in others is
often a reflection of yourself, or that what you perceive in others, you will
project and this will become your reality.
There are
2 aspects to this concept, but first, let’s start with a bit of background as
to where this theme came from.
Perception
is Projection is an idea or a concept that originates from Carl Jung, the Swiss
Psychologist, who was famous for his work on the Collective Unconscious.
Jung says
that we all have a shadow self which is made up of the elements of our
personality we do not like. Sometimes we dislike them so much that we repress
them and deny their existence. But they are still there and they’re still at
work, at an unconscious level.
We can
project these unconscious parts of our personality onto other people, almost in
a way to feel better about ourselves and to not have to deal with the
truth… the truth that there is something there that we could work on
ourselves.
He said
that there is nothing in the outside world that isn’t projected from our
psyche onto the world around us.
You see,
while we continue to keep our own shadows repressed, we will continue to see
them in others, because the world outside us is only a reflection of the world
inside us.
How much time do you spend noticing or pointing out other
people’s rightness or wrongness or ‘bad qualities’?
This behaviour
is not very useful unless you learn something from it. Below are two questions
that I always like to ask myself if ever I am faced with a person whose
behaviour or actions I don’t like.
1.
How is this person’s behaviour a problem to me?
2.
What am I seeing in this person that I don’t like about myself?
Carl
Jung once said “Everything that irritates us
about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
This is
the notion of perception is projection – that what we perceive in others in often
a reflection of ourselves, and consequently we have ‘projected’ this onto the
other person.
So when we start to look inwards at how other people’s behaviour is a problem
to us, we can start to gain a greater understanding of ourselves and also be
able to do something about it.
Therefore,
instead of just spending the day winding ourselves up about how much the
actions of another person bother us (and remember, you can’t make another person change, so wishing and
willing that to happen is frankly a waste of energy!), if we work out HOW their
behaviour is a problem to us, we can perhaps begin to change our own
perceptions, judgements and behaviours and quite often find that the ‘problem’
was purely a creation of our own thoughts and beliefs. That realisation can be
really empowering for a person who has perhaps believed or found themselves at
the effect of other people for a long period of time.
The other
aspect of Perception is Projection that we can explain is something that I
think most people have been guilty of at some point in their life, and this is
the idea that what we believe to be true about another person we will project,
and that will become our reality.
Let
me put that into context a bit. Imagine you are having a conversation with a
friend of yours, and they tell you about somebody that you are due to meet
shortly. The conversation goes something like this,
“oh, you mean Bill? Yes, I know
him – you’ll hate him – really obnoxious, and completely full of himself. You
can’t trust him at all”.
What will
be going through you mind at the moment when you meet Bill? That’s right – all
the things that your friend has told you – obnoxious, arrogant, untrustworthy.
If you are thinking all these things when you meet him, you are also projecting
all of these things – you will be looking out for any ‘signs’ of any of these
traits being true, and consequently you will distort and filter the information
you get back from Bill and they will become your reality.
So when
Bill extends his hand to you with a big smile and says that he’s really glad to
meet you, you could very easily take this to be an arrogant gesture and that he
isn’t glad to meet you at all (because remember, he can’t be trusted!) So what
you have perceived has become your projection, and that is what you will get
back. Poor old Bill!
I hope
that has helped to explain this concept a bit – if you choose to take this
concept on, then next time you meet someone who behaves in a way which, in your
model of the world, isn’t acceptable, before you pass judgement or label that
person, think about ‘Perception is Projection’. Ask yourself how their
behaviour is a problem to you, and what it is that you’re seeing in that person
that you don’t like about yourself. It’s a tough one, and you may just learn
something about yourself that you hadn’t understood before!
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