My thanks to...A summary of my 2014

今年是我人生上的另一個轉類點。將自己對的dream analysis therapy 和hypnotherapy 的熱情化爲了行動。

做了七次工作坊和不少個案，和個案同笑同哭,也是對自己的深切療愈，不論是從自己的夢，還是別人的夢境療愈 産生的微妙變化,都說明 所有的改變必須是潛意識的改變。改變可以很痛苦，也可以很輕松。我深切感到:夢境療愈最美麗的地方是去覺醒,是自己的夢驚醒自己. 夢境治療可以很自在，因爲不是別人發的指令，更不是爲別人而改變，所有的信息來自心底的渴望和盼望。

感恩解夢後大家由不認識到成爲知己、好朋友

這兩天不斷有朋友表達他們對自己夢境療愈的感恩：

Many thanks Donna. Your unselfish contribution make the world even more beautiful! You are our thanks giving!

感恩你的熱誠，你令我更深入了解夢境的意義，留意到自心深處的渴求和関注，有機會和你分享，我的體驗，多謝你! 我簡單的分享是，當你深信夢境時，它，這個朋友，就會告訴你更多，更淺白，很有趣。 

好感動 Donna 為我解夢，透過自己的夢境，一層一層的解構自己，安撫內在的自己，重拾力量，非常感激Donna

你们的鼓勵和激勵，使我更有動力。其实你們給我的更多，讓我看到每個人都早已是自己的智慧大師，我不過是成長路上的一支手臂，協助別人去探索自己的潛意識，發現自己的寶座,，無限的內在資源，建立自己最安全的地方-自己心靈的家！



 2014 From Donna

My reflection about dreams of my friends

Dear J

I would like to share more reflections from my heart about your dreams, what I learnt and thought at this moment: maybe it is a mirror to myself

The ghost and you:

当孩子时，大人基本上没有试过赞美和拥抱，没有沟通，父母辛勤工作，也只能维持最基本的生活，做孩子是那种被冷漠和无助，你不僅感到貧窮帶來的家庭壓力，還感到有一種無奈和孤獨， 恐慌，无力和无安全感，直到成年或老年的自己仍挥之不去。这个梦在讲什么？ 梦者什么时候出现这个梦？孤单，无助。那就是：不论来到那个年纪，人们都有內在渴望：渴望有是一份心靈的支持、關心和愛。

这个梦提提醒我们做父母的：孩子不是只需要物質的保障和安全，更是要父母的撫摸，擁抱和關愛。

你的這個童年夢可能是一代代人的集體夢，每個人何況不是要的這個最基本和最貼心的安全感。
這個夢給我的啟示，給子女的愛是要講出來的，是心裡的撫摸和聆聽。不是嘮嘮叨叨，或物資滿足那麼簡單。對任何家人也一樣。

夢的有效性是永遠的，因為它們是隱喻故事，是人類的渴望。提醒我们回归到人类最基本的东西，那就是心灵沟通。

The nurse dormitories

The three dormitories shows your developing spirituality: 

from chasing a self security, to self esteem, self security and confidence by becoming more knowledgeable to inner space, inner peace and inner security.

You  may find that the most security is from nowhere but self, by cleaning off self ego and by connecting with people and selfless contribution.

Exploration from a small building to endless buildings, flats and people around you
This dream is so profound that it must have multiple insights:

As you have said, 以為看到，但愈看越看不透，新新舊舊，不斷變化，人生不就是這樣
的嗎？我們以為明白自己和別人，但卻是深不可測，不是我們有什麼問題，而是我們也在變化，身體的變化，思想的變化，世界都在變，所以你的夢讓我們明白到變幻才是永恆，接受它，擁抱它，既使（后樓梯：displacement of 前路）前路有很多障礙物,方向是正確的，前途是光明的，有希望的，（你的潛意識 总是那么正面。）一直走下去，就可以走出自己的天空。（楼梯出口）

Thank you so much for your appreciation and encouragement. Yes, dream analysis is my passion and inner talent， i have a intuition and compassion to get connection with people inner world. I will  treasure my potential. I will excel myself from practice more dream therapy and coaching, and by leaning from other senior teachers, do more study on psychological courses and reading more books.

Your dreams are so resourceful, brilliant and powerful. I am more pleased to see you have been following your dream insights to heal yourself and to fulfill your spiritual dreams, a more meaningful life is to shine on.

With love and gratitude.

Additional reading 

 http://donnahypnotherapycoach.blogspot.hk/2014/07/blog-post_18.html

Donna

Some recent dream insights from people and myself

最近正在上解夢課，夢境比平時都多，解自己的夢，又和朋友們解夢，夢和生活融於一體. 從中有一個深刻

的感覺

The more we know ourselves, the more we don't know ourselves and the more we need to learn from ourselves.

Our dreams tell us our potential, strength and weaknesses, creativity, passion and wishes; dreams are 

languages of our body, mind and spirituality at sleeping state.……so resourceful and profound. Dreams 

never sleep. They are not anyone but our subconscious mind, our energy sources and drive engines

在新的一年裡，讓我們一起跨越夢境，活出更多夢想

Grateful for all of your trust and love.

 — feeling thankful.

Feedback

Jenny Heung Dp 24 Teacher: Donna, 衷心多謝你為我解夢，透過今次，我更能深入體會夢可以給我們多層次的訊息。再一次加強我的信心，通過解夢，與潛意識溝通。Donna, 你很棒，理性感性兼備，專心一致，力求更深層次地解夢。更令我欣賞的地方，是你的無私分享，內裏的善和美，很感動，很感激。努力加油啊！我會寫下今天的總結，遲些分享。我

Dear Jenny

你的梦境带出 很多人生的哲理
the more we know, the more we don't know and  the more to learn. Curiosity keeps us explore and improve.

Grateful for your trust and love, we all learn and grow together 活出自在人生。
your dreams  reflect your more potential, dig deeply. not just what we talked.

Subconscious mind is linked with our universal energy.
不用死力，找到passion, 活出梦想。

My dream sharing with Karen during lunch 17.12.2014


Dear Karen

It was a very precious sharing today with u.

I really appreciate that you treat your dreams not just curious but respectful. This is very important as u have known that  dreams are part of our thinking system, our subconscious mind during sleep state, controlling our decision and behavior models, no matter we know it exists or not.

However if we can analyse our dreams and find their insights, we can make a huge difference, because there is profound resources and potential in our subconscious mind that we have not yet developed, that can excel.
Dreams function as a body protector to our health as some examples i shared with u.
Dreams also functions as our inner teacher to guide us on the right track, as well as our wisdom guru to lead us to live on our passion.

Meantime, it is our alarm clock by using crazy dreams, nightmares to send caring, loving messages, reminding us  to truly listen to our inner voices.

今天中午和你相聚Lunch.我更感受到你是一個very passionate social worker, hardworking. 好高兴我們的社會有你这样一群关心弱勢家庭孩子的需要热心人，令很多尔家庭都受惠。

很欣慰你对自己的萝境得兴趣。一口气分享了你几个萝，因為时间和环境的关系，解梦需要更多资料和有关知识。我只能大概讲下梦的一些功能，有机会在电话里可以詳細探討，不论是一個萝还是一連串的梦，都可以有深刻的自我發現，我会带着大家去学习解自己的萝，因为只有自己最了解自己的心声，我的工作坊的目的也希望可以让更多人和内在自己做好朋友，做自已的解萝師，自己的心灵导师。

望以后有机会合作，为这些孩子和家长搞一些身心灵工作坊。❤

18-12-2014

My dream insights

Some thoughts about our body health voice
1
we can't take our health for granted. It can go after sending so many warnings to us, by physical pain, nightmares and sicknesses.
2
the greatest love is to learn how to love ourselves. people who love us will be so happy and grateful if we truly love ourselves.
3
Our soul has higher goals, but our bodied sometimes can't afford. At this time, we have to be realistic, take more rest, listening to our body voice. that is calling from our subconsciousness. Only Oneness, balanced life will be sustainable. Our bodies are always ready to support us to chase our dreams, but don't burn out our bodies, our last and the most precious carrier to back up us to fulfill our dreams.

FORGIVING PROCESS -寬恕,原諒的冥想練習

從寫稿,錄音到剪接,修改用了一年多的時間,終於可以ONLINE, 和大家分享,一起修心修行,心身安頓,智慧來!

整個過程,是對自己一個極大的鞭策和提升。如果有一天我仍有受害者的念頭,仍由內疚,放不下,我都需要做Forgiving Process。

整個過程,通過說故事 講出內心感受，令自己感動，給自己能量。 因為我深深相信：Hypnotherapy is the bridge connecting the lands of knowing and realizing。　

Forgiving is an attitude and a state of mind.

                                                           http://youtu.be/C4XhUilr2LQ

"When a deep injury is done to us, we will never recover until we forgive, Forgiveness does not change the past. But it does enlarge the future." ~Mary Karen Read

今天,我同大家一起做一個forgiveness meditation。我喜歡做Meditation 原因是meditation是一自我催眠， 是以個相信自己無論是在催眠師帶領或在自已意識帶領下，進入一個非常放鬆狀態，然後在享受這個放鬆過程中，讓潛意識自然、舒適地收到一些正面的信息，埋下種子，就好似成為身體的一部分。同時從中也聆聽自己潛意識的心聲，發掘內在資源，讓潛能得到更好地發揮。

Holding onto conscious and unconscious hurt and anger can be the root of many illnesses。 I believe true personal liberation comes from the release of past hurts。 This meditative gives you a practical way of releasing hurts gradually if practice consistently all the way from your core self to your muscle memory。

有時,我們以為自己已作到了寬恕，包容，但潛意識並沒完全接受。還會走回頭路。建立新的信念和價值觀，需要長期修煉。

渴望通過做Forgiving Process及感恩,令自己每天都清鬆自在，不帶包袱。

每天都看到一個不一樣的自己，不一樣的別人，不一樣的世界。Move forward.

A video makes me cry......

People ask me, “By hypnotherapy, could you help me to delete traumatic memory, memory of people they hate and events they make me sleepless?  ”

I think we cannot delete any memory but ask if I really want to get out of the psycho-prison. If yes, probably forgiveness is the most powerful way - forgiving others means free ourselves.

Forgive is not to accept the behavior but the people, forgiveness cannot change the past but open the door of freedom ...... a lifelong learning: Forgiveness is an attitude and a state of mind.

Almost everyday we can use FORGIVENESS to clean our dark Shadow, to be freer ourselves.

                                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VUCK2MZty4

Published on １５－１２－２０１４

What are our dreams calling ?

和朋友傾談, 再次發現夢是我們最貼身的老師和医生. 健康問題,愛情,事業上的選擇,夢都一一有回應:特別是健康上. 我從他們的夢和自己的夢深深感到每個人内在智慧,潛意識之伟大, 那份愛之深

- Our dream insights – Our INNER voice， our BODY voice:

1 
We can't take our health for granted. It can go away and disappear after sending so many warnings to us, by physical pain, nightmares and sicknesses.
2
The greatest love is to learn how to love ourselves. People who love us will be so happy and grateful if we truly love ourselves.
3
Our soul has higher goals, but our bodied sometimes can't afford us to overwork, overuse our limiting bio-resources. At this time, we have to be realistic, take more rest, listening to our body voice. That is calling from our subconsciousness. Only Oneness in body, mind and soul, balanced life will be sustainable. Our bodies are always ready to support us to chase our dreams, as long as not burning out our bodies - our last and the most precious carrier to back up us to fulfill our dreams.

11-12-2014

如何直接表達情感,产生有效的溝通 I message

I message application 

10-12-2014

Quality of life is quality of communication

I start to think over this sentence and love this saying so much the first time from my NLP coach Mr Chris Howard 5 years ago.

在處理紛爭個案　（家庭,婚姻還是工作) ,或是处理我自己的家庭生活的協調和幸福,我深深感到，一個懂得尊重別人，善解人意，又懂得直接表達情感的人，他和身邊人的互動都會開心好多。因為爲Quality of life is quality of communication. 很多問題最后後變成分手的導火綫線,都可能是一些細小，瑣碎的誤解。

如何才能做到一個好的直接表達又不會令人有不愉快的感覺，達到更好的理解和溝通的效果？

在我的學習溝通和實踐中，首先， 當自己一有不舒服的感覺，不開心的情緒，察覺它，接受自己有情緒，想象如果帶著這個情緒，對自己有什麽“好處”？與人相處，有什麽問題？（aware of it, accept it and see if we hold this emotion, what is the impact, health impact to ourselves, esp. and relationship impact. ）

然後,我們從不同的角度去分析這件事的起因，很可能自己也有錯。這樣，自己也要說“對不起了”。別人的行為背後都有一個正面的動機。我們不認同行爲，但我們可以理解别人的動機。同时，學習寬恕，原諒別人，不原諒別人，就是不原諒自己。何解？生別人的氣就像是憋著一口氣不呼吸，等同傷害自己，慢性自殺！所以，要原諒自己。放下包袱，才能繼續向前。這樣，我們就會平靜下來，智慧自然而來。看到積极的，各種解決的方法和希望。

Then we can analyze from different angles, self, others, environments, and any factors to cause this issue and how to understand this issue with most objective approach. We can find that there is always a positive intention ( maybe purely for themselves goodness) behind every behavior,  so we don’t have to agree with the behavior but we understand their intention. That is the source of empathy. Once we have empathy, we can calm down and feel in peace.

We also need to forgive ourselves first:

The significance of Forgiveness is for forgiver himself more than the forgiven person. Forgiving sets ourselves free; enable us to stay much calmer and peaceful, giving us wisdom. Unforgiving is like to hold our breath and feeling suffocated, which can cause many diseases. So forgiving is to protect us from being "slowly killed" by our own.

Everyone is resourceful, with plenty of wisdom in our subconscious mind until we are in calm and peace.

當我們自己處於一個平靜放鬆的狀態，別人自然會受到影響。

當自己可以不帶情緒，別人的狀態也平靜下來，我們就可以极积的溝通了：

1 表示自己重視這個關係，望有更好的溝通和了解

Appreciate other character or quality and express how you value the relationship.

2

不帶任何情緒地敘述事情和你自己不舒服的感受。這是我的感受而以。

3聽別人的回應，也許這裡有誤解需得到化解。

4 提出建議：今後…是否，如果，可不可以…

5 你認为如何可以改善？你覺得怎樣呢？你的看法呢？互相磋商，達到一個雙方可以接受的方案。

所有的溝通都是為大家好，WIN-WIN的結果是我們的目標。過去發生的事都是一個學習的經驗。放下左腳，右腳才能跨出，向前。

幸福的生活就是互相尊重，了解和信任的互動吧！

In general, you can appreciate the person for his good intention or behavior that make you feel happy or important.

Then, you can tell him you really care for him or value the relationship. That is why you have something to discuss or share with him by directly, factually mentioning an event or issue that you feel uncomfortable/unhappy. This is only your feeling. You take the responsibility for that feeling.

You might want to clarify or give some suggestions with open sentences, maybe , perhaps, or, we may. could we... is that better? 

Finally you add one sentence like "what do you feel "? What is your view about it? Can we make a peace or work out a method or resolve it.

More reference

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96HHepwQpmA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nu7Nh3Vs7k0

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I-message

Let’s learn to use I message to well express ourselves

"I message" core intention is to establish a healthy relationship.

I-statements help the individual avoid blame, turning blame into own personal responsibility. Personal responsibility is key to learning to use I-statements. Without personal responsibility, I-statements are null in their intention.

I-messages are often used with the intent to be assertive without putting the listener on the defensive. They are also used to take ownership for one's feelings rather than implying that they are caused by another person.

I-                 messages are often used with the intent to be assertive without putting the listener on the defensive. They are also used to take ownership for one's feelings rather than implying that they are caused by another person. An example of this would be to say: "I really am getting backed up on my work since I don't have the financial report yet," rather than: "you didn't finish the financial report on time!" (The latter is an example of a "you-statement").

An "I" message has three basic parts: * "I feel . . ." Tell how you feel. Follow "I feel" with a feeling word: "I feel disappointed" * "when you . . ." Tell what caused the feeling. "I feel disappointed when you cancel our plans at the last minute." * "I want . . . "Tell what you want to happen: "I feel disappointed when you cancel our plans at the last minute. I want you to let me know earlier if you can't make it."

 http://www.thirteen.org/peaceful/strate.html#imessage

I-messages or I-statements can also be used in constructive criticism. For instance, one might say, "I had to read that section of your paper three times before I understood it," rather than, "This section is worded in a really confusing way," or "You need to learn how to word a paper more clearly." The former comment leaves open the possibility that the fault lies with the giver of the criticism. According to the Conflict Resolution Network, I-statements are a dispute resolutionconversation opener that can be used to state how one sees things and how one would like things to be, without using inflaming language^[4]

In general, you can appreciate the person for his good intention or behavior that makes you feel happy or important.

Then, you can tell him you really care for him or value the relationship. That is why you have something to discuss or share with him by directly, factually mentioning an event or issue that you feel uncomfortable/unhappy. This is only your feeling. You take the responsibility for that feeling.

You might want to clarify or give some suggestions with open sentences, maybe , perhaps, or, we may. could we... is that better? 

Finally you add one sentence like "what do you feel "? What is your view about it? Can we make a peace or work out a method or resolve it.

夢與失而復得

8-12-2014

今天早上的夢又再敦促我反省了。

夢中，我去參加一個我很重要和很有挑战、渴望的考試，但我忘記帶了考試証， 無奈，要折回去拿。肯定遲到了。

醒來，自己都有心笑了出來。

這不正是我昨他出門不記得帶鑰匙，前天上課不記得帶手機，昨晚出門前不記得帶八達通嗎？

等 taxi， 但卻偏偏沒有。

最后還是遲到。

有時有失去錢包，手袋，書包，手機的夢。這些都是重復的夢。

想想，白天不正是剛好處於找東西的狀態。好在每次都找到！

"好在是一場夢！" 如果只是這樣簡單地去理解夢，噩夢就會不斷出現，而夢的預兆也會靈驗！

解夢最重要的不只要知道她在講什麼，而是要改行為。修行，就是改思考模式，行為模式。內在的程式。

夢呀夢，你真是我的贴身好老師，一天我不修改RUSH the last minute issue,   問題都會不斷重復。

我在問自己，問題我明白，但修改時卻那麼難！是什麼second gain 搞鬼？

潛意識呀潛意識，謝謝你再次，反復提醒，我會反思，我要學習慢的生活。也許，我更要學習怎樣愛自己，感恩自己的梦让我聆聽身體的說話，身心靈同步成長。

How Hypnosis Works (1)

Article from a famous hypnotherapist

How Hypnosis Works Within the Mind – Includes diagram

A simple way of understanding how hypnosis works is to view the mind as having 3 separate components:

1. The Conscious Mind
2. The Subconscious Mind
3. The Unconscious Mind

In reality these minds intermingle and overlap, creating the complex web of our brains, but if we view these minds as separate entities we can understand how and why hypnosis is so effective.

Just as all human beings have different personalities and tendencies, the same can be said about the conscious, subconscious and unconscious minds.

The Conscious Mind

The conscious mind is, of course, where all of our conscious thoughts and actions originate. It is also the area of the mind that willpower, rationality and the ability to analyze reside. All temporary thoughts are stored here.

This is the area of the mind that psychologists appeal to, rationalizing situations with the hope that the client may find peace in that conscious knowledge.

However, as many people know, even though consciously we may be aware of why we behave a certain way, and want to change that behavior, more often than not we continue that behavior anyway.

Take, for example, a mother who yells constant abuse at her children even though she knows it’s wrong and would like to stop. Consciously she knows all the reasons why she does it – it was the way she was raised – but still she does not stop the behavior. The same story goes for the overweight person with high blood pressure that continues to eat fatty foods and the smoker who has watched both smoking parents die of lung cancer. Consciously they all know, but just can’t seem to change.

So why can’t we change with willpower and rational thinking alone? Well it’s the personality of the conscious mind. It’s lazy. The conscious mind follows the lead of the subconscious and rarely overpowers it.

The Critical Factor

The critical factor can viewed as a protective barrier between the conscious and subconscious minds. Its purpose is to protect the subconscious from negative experience by either accepting or rejecting suggestions and experiences. On the whole it works very effectively but can work against us when we want to change a pattern.

For example you may state to yourself that you will not eat anymore chocolate again because you want to lose weight. However, the subconscious mind may have a pattern already formed where you eat lots of chocolate because it remembers how much pleasure it bought you as a child on holidays. It doesn’t matter that it was the holiday at the time that made you happy, the fact was that you were eating chocolate at the same time as being happy and so that’s the pattern that was created. You eat to be happy even though consciously you know it’s silly. In this case, the critical factor rejecting your analysis and rationalization hurts you.

The Subconscious Mind

The subconscious mind contains every experience that you have ever had, whether you were or are aware of that experience or not. It holds all of this in its permanent memory and doesn’t know the difference between real and imagined.

Using past experience, the subconscious mind creates patterns and habits for you to follow automatically. These patterns are created as a reaction to experience without rational thought and may be viewed, consciously, as either negative or positive.

If there is a pattern in our subconscious mind that we are trying to overcome with willpower, the subconscious mind will work very hard to beat the conscious mind into submission. For example, when trying to quit smoking cold turkey, people report withdrawal symptoms that include persistent negative thoughts or even lighting a cigarette without consciously realizing it!

The Unconscious Mind

The unconscious mind stores and controls the automatic nervous system and immune system which are basically all of your physical body processes that you don’t think about. I.e. the beating of your heart and breathing. It is also accessible with hypnosis, but doesn’t tend to be used unless the client is requesting physical healing.

 The Hypnotic Effect

Put simply, hypnosis bypasses the critical factor allowing access to the subconscious mind.

Because the subconscious mind does not know the difference between real and imagined experience, when we access it through hypnosis, by visualizing or imaging what we want as well as repeating positive phrases, the subconscious mind uses those experiences to reprogram its patterns. This brings about wonderful, positive change with much less effort.

So Will I Lose Control & Be Made to do Something I Don’t Want to?

The critical factor doesn’t disappear entirely during hypnosis it just lets its guard down so to speak. Further more, you will be consciously aware during the whole process and the conscious mind is just as capable of rejecting suggestions as the critical factor is.

This is why it is important for you to remain positive consciously and to say ‘YES’ internally when the hypnotist is giving you suggestions. That is your part of the process, agree and whole heartedly commit to your desired outcome and the hypnotist will make it easy.

6-12-2014